I spent a few days this past week officiating a wedding in Riviera Maya, Mexico for a remarkable couple that I met about six months ago. The wedding ceremony took place last night on the beach and was followed by dinner with about thirty-five guests. (Yes, sometimes being a Rabbi has perks.)
The wedding was an incredibly beautiful affair held at an upscale resort that is owned by a Jewish family from Mexico City. But what made the evening truly magical was the conversation that I had with the bride’s grandmother, who lived in New City for over fifty years before retiring with her husband to Manhattan. As dinner began, she and I played a few good rounds of Jewish geography where we discovered many mutual connections including our very own Stan and Betty Cohen, with whom she and her husband remain very close.
As we ate dinner together, the grandmother told me about her life-long enthusiasm for Jewish life. She explained that her grandparents (the bride’s great-great grandparents) owned a Jewish summer camp in Pennsylvania where Judaism was infused into daily living. She had raised her children and grandchildren to have a deep appreciation for Jewish living and was incredibly devoted to instilling Jewish values within her family. She and her husband are now proud members of Shaaray Tefillah in Manhattan.
It was at this point in the conversation that the grandmother spoke to me about the meaning of wealth. Here we were, in one of the most beautiful places in all of the world, having a private dinner on a beach at a luxurious resort. But this alone—she noted—was not true wealth.
She explained how she asked her grandchildren at this past Rosh Ha-Shanah what they thought true wealth was all about. The groom—whose wedding I had just officiated—turned to her as the family was gathering and said out loud, “isn’t this true wealth?” He passed her test.
This week, we are reading Parashat Vayakhel-Pekukei, the final portion of the book of Exodus in which the Israelites are about to begin the building of the elaborate structure known as the Mishkan. The Mishkan is a fancy housing for God, replete with gold and finely detailed ornaments. But just as they are about to begin building this physical home, Moses reminds the Israelites about Shabbat. He warns them not to be deceived into believing that wealth can be found in things or the amassment of stuff. He warns the Israelites not to lose themselves in wealth defined as that which is physical.
It is within Shabbat—within sacred time—where wealth truly exists. It is only in sacred time where family and friends can gather and meet one another, where people can fall in love and have compassion and care for one another–it is only in sacred time where human living can reach its full potential.
Too often, we view our happiness through the lens of what we own and what we can purchase and what more we can get instead of who we are connected to and when we will be able to spend time with them. Shabbat demands that we turn our attention from wealth as the physical and recognize true wealth as relationships and gathering and connecting.
As I sat at the pool this morning, my lesson on wealth continued. I randomly heard a father speaking to his perhaps eight or nine year old son. The son who was taking note of the beautiful pools and luxury all around asked, “Dad, money isn’t everything right?” And the father answered, “You know, some of the poorest people in the world are the happiest and some of the people with the most money are the most miserable.” I smirked as I heard him and realized that he must be one of the grandmother’s family members.
Wishing you all a Shabbat of meaning and true wealth.
